Friday, July 31, 2009

Excuse me, may I ask you a question?

So, there's this homeless woman in the city that does the rounds. Her schpeel begins, "Excuse me, may I ask you a question?" Yesterday, I had the pleasure of being one of her victims, while waiting on my bus to go to work. I get the prompted question and respond, "Sure," knowing where this was headed. I wait for the next bit, and she says, "I just wanted to ask, some people say no. Do you have any money..." I cut her off and said, "No, I have nothing, sorry." She turned away and mumbled, "Fucking liar." I caught her eye and responded in the driest way possible, "Fuck. Off." This totally got her panties in a wad, and she starting screaming at the top of her lungs--hurling every obscenity at me possible. I burst out laughing, looked her straight in the eye again and said, "Fuck. Off." At this point she was really spinning out of control and running down the street and turning back to scream more insults my way. My favourite, "Fucking poofter! You like it up the ass!" I just turned to the crowd standing around and said, "Good morning, all."

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Jupiter and Birth Certificates

This Aussie's discovery made me realise how lucky we all are to still be alive; this American's theatrical outburst made me realise how many people waste their lives on ignorant delusions.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009


I am beginning to feel a bit snubbed by the Obama Administration. I know, we gays think the whole world revolves around us...mostly, it does. Candidate Obama promised us the moon. The moon being overturning DOMA, eliminating DADT, and encouraging federal legislation for domestic partner benefits and rights. President Obama isn't really living up to message, YES WE CAN!

I know, we're only 6 months into this, so shut up and fall into line.

The problem is I'm not a Democrat, and I'm certainly not a Republican. Actually, I misspoke. I'm currently registered with the Democratic Party. I switched party affiliation during the primaries, so I could vote for Obama. I was registered as a Libertarian...for the record, I'm not one of the "get-out-of-my-fucking-way" type of Libertarians; rather, I'm one of the "do-what-you-want-to-do-but don't-get-in-my-fucking-face" type of Libertarians...there is a difference. I keep meaning to switch back to my "real" party, but the truth of the matter is I hate politics and I don't like ideologues (of any stripe) and I'm in Australia, so why should I give a shit? I voted for Obama in the primaries because I believed him (see 3rd sentence of this post), and I don't like the Clintons.

My dislike for the Clintons isn't related to the usual bullshit you hear from Republicans. The day that President Clinton signed DOMA was the day I vowed I would never vote again in a US presidential election--it took George Bush running for a second term for me to break that promise to myself (another story, which I won't go into here.) Gays (queers, for those of you on the two poles) are such a tiny minority even though we pack a wallop during an election. Republicans love to demonize us and Democrats love to lie to us. Anyway, aside from believing candidate Obama (see 3rd sentence of this post), I couldn't separate Hillary from her husband. Unfair? Maybe. But that's marriage.

After Obama won the primaries and the general election campaign went into full swing, it was a no-brainer. Palin...remember her, the pitbull with lipstick? End of story. End of paragraph.

The other day, Obama met with a group of gays to reconfirm the promises he made to the gay community during the election. I want to believe him, but I'm not holding my breath.